13 Aug
12th of august and 12 days left. (correction, it was the 13th, but somehow the whole diary is one day off. I have changed to the correct date in the headline for each part though).
I’ve gotten in to the routines, going to bed about 21:30, getting up 06:00 – 06:30. Three meals per day, same time every day. When you don’t have to think, time goes by really fast. Like those who have had the same job for 25 years, being at the same exact place for all those years and they ask themselves what happened to their lives. It’s a bit like a trance.
Anyway… I guess this day was as usual, except that we watched a DVD on a big screen. But, like I later realized: Everything is the same thing anyway. Everything is experiences. Why separate the eggs from the mixture, it’s all going to turn in to pancakes anyway.
Very comical and funny Dasa today. He really has the ability to get everyone so see truth about themselves and laugh while doing so. Kind of the Seinfeld of spirituality.
Today was the first time for 2 weeks that I drank something else than water. Some kind of a powder you mix with water to give you more energy. Taste like orange and there’s some vitamin C added to it.. And something else. I’ve been longing to drink something sweet. I hardly even think about the Mauna. I don’t even want to talk at all. I like being by my own, to myself. That’s a liberating feeling to me.
The Italians here just can’t respect the Mauna though. I’ve seen them gather around the round tables outside, as soon as it gets dark, to talk. Almost like someone trying to quit smoking, sneaking away in the dark to have a smoke. But it doesn’t really bother me.
Experienced a lot of energies today during the meditation with the “cosmic beings”. If I had been at home, I would have gone home afterwards, turned on the computer and eaten crisps or something. Can’t do that here, but that’s OK. You can buy crisps and cookies here but I havn’t really felt like it.
I purchased a couple of framed pictures, a T-shirt and that powder.
The night was not fun at all. Horrible headache. Couldn’t sleep. Felt nauseous and like I had a fever. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore and took an aspirin. After an hour I fell asleep (about 04:30).
Strangely, I’ve felt very alert the whole day.
Good food here. You live like at a good standard hotel.
I don’t feel especially grateful or any will to meditate or pray. Feels good that this feeling is 100% accepted within me.
Everything flows smoothly.
Good night!
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14 Aug (about 21:00)
Today I bought some things to those at home. Nothing special. A couple of CD’s some kind of special Indian toothpaste with something special in it, a soap, a book (evenings with Bhagavan) and a framed picture of Amma. Last but not least CRISPS!. I’ve eaten crisps in golden city 
.
Routines and deeksha like usual.
My inner process is right now about the mind and how it is impossible to get rid of. However it does lose some control over oneself if you can just see it. Just look at it without judging.
For example if you are afraid of something: “I am afraid!”. Not: “ I am afraid, but I’m not supposed to feel like that because bla bla bla and that is because bla bla bla” – in all eternity. That’s the game of the mind. We have tried solving our problems for millions of years by analyzing and reasoning. Has it worked?
What ever you feel: Accept it. Why? … Because it’s there. There is nothing you can do about it. That makes it lose it’s charge. Even escaping from the mind is a trick of the mind. It ALWAYS wants you to become or achieve something new. It says to us: “it’s right there, the solution is just around the next corner!” For all eternity. But the house is round!
Today during the meditation with the “cosmic beings”, almost everyone started laughing hysterically (for “no reason”). When we all had just calmed down and it was quiet again, one woman laughed a little bit and someone shushed her: “ssschhh!!” and we all broke out in even bigger laughter!
What the…. My towel was gone after the room got cleaned. Good thing I brought extra ones. I sent a text message to my family (to dad), saying that everything is OK, and another one to Therése.
The 15th (I think) is Amma’s birthday. Let’s see what happens then. Maybe a super-duper party? ;D
I’m going to get to bed here soon.. I’m not tired though. The last 2 days I’ve had incredible energy.
GOOD NIGHT!
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To be continued….
/Marcus Knudsen
http://www.xphirience.com
Tags: Amma Golden city, Bhagavan, bliss code, bliss coded sound, deeksha, Meditation, oneness, xphirience